


Save a Horse, Ride a Pirate?

by Liliako



Category: Big Time Rush RPF
Genre: Clothed Sex, Clothed frottage really, Costume Parties & Masquerades, Demi & Selena guest star momentarily as Little Red and Dorothy, F/F, Featuring DHenrie as Drunk Lampshade Batman Dancing On A Table, First Time Meeting, Grapefruits for boobs, Guyliner, Halloween Costumes, Kendall as Sleeping Beauty, Kissing, Logan as Captain Jack Sparrow, M/M, Public Hand Jobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-16
Updated: 2015-10-16
Packaged: 2018-04-26 14:57:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5009092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liliako/pseuds/Liliako
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Princess Aurora and Jack Sparrow meet for the first time in a dimly lit corner that happens to be Little Red and Dorothy's make out spot.<br/>OR<br/>When 'do what you gotta do, man' turns out to be 'gotta rub one out real quick using your foofy dress as a shield' you go from strangers to acquaintances real fast.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Save a Horse, Ride a Pirate?

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on LJ for Trick or Drabble here: http://liliako.livejournal.com/7982.html#cutid1

Selena always threw good parties and her Halloween bash was no exception. Kendall’s sort of glad he doesn’t know many people there because he’d lost a stupid bet with Kevin and now he had to wear a stupid pink princess dress, Aurora, the sleeping one, and a stupid blonde wig that itched. He picked out his corner as soon as he walked in the door; there was a couch close to a corner with a dimmed lamp that gave good mood lighting and, when playing your guitar to get laid, mood lighting was a big plus. Especially when you’re dressed as a chick, trying to seduce girls was going to be difficult. Kevin would join him now and again but he’d mostly float from group to group charming everyone, so when in the middle of a song the couch next to him bends under the weight of someone he just keeps on playing without looking.

“’Sup?” And that’s not Kevin’s voice, so Kendall looks over at his new company. Slouched next to him on this two cushioned couch, that, now that Kendall thinks of it, is totally one of those love seat things, is some guy with big eyes rimmed in black liner and he’s decked out like he’s supposed to be Captain Jack Sparrow except his hair isn’t long, it’s cut pretty short and all askew. The guy throws an arm over the back of the couch behind Kendall’s ugly wig and angles his body towards the pink foofy dress Kendall’s currently hiding in. After getting a once over and an eyebrow wiggle, Kendall decides this needs to stop.

“Dude, I lost a bet, these are grapefruits, and I’m a guy so chill out,” he points at his stuffed chest and shrugs. The pirate leans back a little and tilts his head one way and then the other but doesn’t seem convinced so Kendall pulls off the stupid itchy wig and shakes out his real hair. Captain Jack sort of sways back into the outer edges of Kendall’s personal space bubble and then the heavily guy-linered eyes squint at him.

“Lo- _ghun_!” Comes the bellow before a girl in a Little Red Riding Hood costume, the slutty kind where it’s a short little checkered red dress that has her boobs spilling out the top, hurdles herself onto this guy.

“Hey Kendall!” Selena, dressed as Dorothy in the checkered blue dress and braids, chirps as she plops herself down between Kendall and the rest of the crazies next to him. She wiggles her arm between his and clutches onto his arm, hugging it while trying to keep her red solo cup steady. “How’ve you been? I’m so glad Kevin brought you! Demi!” Selena yells at the girl mauling this stranger next to Kendall. He’s pretty sure she’s motor boating the guy but he doesn’t have a clear view. “D!” Selena tries again, slapping at Demi’s arm. “Woman!” She roars and pulls at Demi’s arm finally breaking her away from the Logan guy as she sits back on his knees, laughing. Kendall sees now by Logan’s dazed expression he was indeed motor boated, if the glazed over eyes and lop-sided loopy smile are anything to go by. “This is Kevin Schmidt’s little brother, Kendall, remember?” Selena puts a hand on Kendall’s chest and Demi peers at him before crawling around on Logan’s lap to sit with her legs draped over his sideways.

“Right!” She grins with her little gap toothed smile that reminds Kendall of his own and he remembers how he’s always felt a strange camaraderie with her. “I just loooove your brother!” Demi says as she loops her arms around Logan’s neck and snuggles into him. “Are you treating my boy good?” She asks and Logan rolls his eyes while his arms wrap around her waist so she won’t fall off the couch.

“Uh, yes?” Kendall answers but glances at Selena because this girl seems a little crazy.

 “Oh! Do you actually know him?” Selena asks, and looking between the two uncomfortable faces she graces them with introductions. “Kendall, this is Logan. Logan, this is Kendall,” she waves her hands and the two boys nod at each other.

“Boys, you two,” Demi pokes a finger at Logan’s chest, “are right in our make out corner!”

“Well by all means,” Logan turns on the charm again, this time wiggling his eyebrows at Demi but she just laughs right in his face.

“Not you! You’re so silly, Logan!” She actually gives a little snort of laughter which makes Selena guffaw like she does before Demi is leaning over between Logan and Kendall and pulling Selena into a kiss. Demi scoots herself over Logan and half onto Selena’s lap and her cup gets pushed into Logan’s now empty Demi-less hands.

When the girls scamper off in a fit of giggles, holding hands and leaning into each other, Logan runs his hands down his thighs. Kendall quirks an eyebrow because it’s a strange movement to make, but when he looks at Logan’s leering expression he’s pretty sure looking at the guys lower half is only going to result in awkwardness. Pirates wear sort of loose breeches type things but it’s kind of like sweatpants, you can still see everything. Kendall coughs and looks away, snatching up his guitar again to give him something else to focus on.

“Huh. You’re smart, dragging that around with you,” Logan remarks and Kendall peeks up at him, making sure to not look anywhere but his face. The obvious leer is gone but the guy has super dark eyes to begin with so it’s hard to tell if he’s _always_ got that look that says ‘thinking about fucking something over any surface’ or if tonight is special. “Way easier for hiding,” he pauses and makes a little hand gesture at his crotch, “than all the other usual methods,” Logan nods, tipping his cup to Kendall in props to this idea Kendall had never even considered. Using his guitar as a boner shield. What the fuck.

“Right. Totally.” Kendall wonders if any other moment in his life can compare to the weirdness going on right now.

“So, you tapped that?”

“Excuse me?”

“Sel, duh. Or is she not your thing? Like that guy who plays her brother,” Logan points across the room to a coffee table atop which David Henrie is in a Batman costume, dancing with a lampshade on his head is classic drunk fashion.

“I don’t know what you mean…”

“Oh, well, when Sel and D realize they got a little too handsy in front of the pap, Sel goes to dinner with him,” he waves a hand at David who is shaking his ass in what looks to be Jennifer Stone’s face, but Kendall can’t tell from this angle, “and D starts talking about that Jonas douche again so everyone has other stuff to report on then the little lesbians at Disney. So are you?”

“I still don’t think I get what you’re saying,” Kendall sets his guitar down back in its case again because he may need to pack it up and beat a hasty retreat out of here soon.

“Sorry, you know I’m past buzzed when I stop making sense, it’s been ‘where’s all the rum gone’ all night,” Logan laughs and it looks like the happiest thing in the world which kind of catches Kendall off guard. “I’ll just be really blunt- did you fuck her before she realized she was into Demi or do you use her as a beard like David so he can do whatever and _who_ ever he wants?”

“Uh, neither. She worked with my brother, I’ve only met her a few times.”

“Oh. My bad,” and they lapse into an awkward silence. Logan’s shifting subtly and trying to use Selena’s drink as a cover up for his boner problem. Kendall feels a little bit of pity for the guy since he’s sure that any other guy sitting with them would be in the same situation, but Kendall’s always thought of Selena as an adorable little doll so watching her kiss anyone is weird, not a turn on. 

And speak of the devil, the two girls are up on the coffee table that used to hold David and dancing together like they were magnetized to each other’s body. “Shiiiiit,” Logan drawls out, motioning at them. Kendall feels like a voyeur watching the girls but he needs to look somewhere besides the big mass of drunk faces that leave him dizzy and his eyes just happen to land on Logan’s hand twitching on his own thigh. He watches the subtlety of the guy’s thumb that presses to, if Kendall goes vaguely with the pirate theme, his Moby Dick. And then it turns into a press of the heel of the hand and when he glances up at Logan’s face his mouth has dropped open a little, just hanging there. “So, dude, no homo, but I gotta take care of business and I need some kind of shield and you’ve got a tent around you man,” and Kendall has to give him credit, the guy knows he can’t wander around the house and wait in line for the bathroom in his state so he’s using his surroundings to adapt. And his surroundings just happen to a big, pink dress. The pity he has turns into a little bit of guilt about not helping this guy.

“Sure, yeah, do what you gotta do man.”

“Really? You’re fucking awesome, thanks, can you just- yeah, and then- great, awesome,” Logan almost man handles Kendall until he’s kneeling on the couch straddled over Logan’s legs, facing the guy with his big, stupid skirt bunched up in the front over Logan’s stomach. This isn’t what Kendall had had in mind but there’s just something about this guy that’s got him doing it anyway. “Cause, again, no homo, you look like a chick from far away so it’s just gonna look like you’re riding me like this,” Logan says as he wraps one hand around Kendall’s taffeta covered hip and he sneaks one hand up under all the layers of the dress. It has this silk under lining and he figured that it helped with static cling on the tights that went with it but he’d refused to wear those, opting instead for a pair of basket ball shorts underneath. “Put your hands up on my shoulders, yup, exactly,” Kendall does as he’s told and it occurs to him how glad he was to have worn the shorts under the dress or this would be even more awkward. Also, he realizes he’s nowhere near drunk enough to pass this off as anything resembling normal so he’s leans forward to try and shield his face from the rest of the room. Logan jiggles his knees and it makes Kendall lurch back and forward and grip hard onto cheap fake fancy pirate shirt fabric.

“What are you-“

“Gotta move if you’re pretending to ride me,” Logan looks at him, not past his shoulder at the girls but actually looks Kendall in the face now. “Oh man, look at your face! Have you never had someone ride you like a rodeo horse? Sheeee-yit,” Logan’s chuckling a little at him while Kendall just sputters and feels himself blush. He used to feel like he was decently experienced for his age but now he just feels like a stupid kid. Logan just smiles slow and dirty and the hand under the dress slides its fingers under the edge of his basketball shorts for a second before Kendall’s ass is being grabbed and yanked forward. Kendall lurches again and he’s been trying hard to keep his pelvis as far from Logan’s as he can to respect his personal space or whatever but Jesus fucking Christ, if he stops kneeling up on his knees then personal space is going to be a thing of the past. As it is, his crotch, though there are layers of dress and basketball shorts and boxer briefs, is almost completely pressed to this guys chest and he’s worried about the pirate guy-liner rubbing off on his dress, since Logan’s face is almost level with his stomach, and then he’d have to explain it.

“Can you just- y’know- I really-“ Kendall is trying to be nice about this, help a guy out and whatever but with all the closeness and touching and he’s pretty sure there’s pheromones or something rolling off Logan in waves because he’s starting to get a little light headed and warm and his dick is getting interested in this straddling position with a mouth closer than normal. This guy is a total manipulative bastard though, he’s coming to realize because his hips are grabbed, one under the dress and one over, and Kendall’s pulled down on Logan’s lap. While this might not be Kendall’s first experience with his dick being so close to another guy’s piece of hardware, this is the first time it’s with an almost stranger. He curls in on himself and tries to keep his unit away from Logan’s while also trying to still hide his face.

“Want me to teach you how to ride, cowboy?” Logan says lowly and his eyes are swallowing Kendall whole and it’s so fucking hypnotizing that when Logan’s hips buck forward a little while pulling again at Kendall’s, Kendall doesn’t lurch because he feels like all his limbs are melting. The buck and the pull bring them bulge to bulge and Kendall grips hard at Logan’s shoulders.

“Are you fucking serious?” Kendall hisses.

“I’m from Texas, I take my cowboys real seriously,” Logan grins and as manipulative as he was in getting Kendall apparently right where he wanted him, it doesn’t seem like he’s really that much of a douche bag. He just seems like someone who is confident because he can put his money where his mouth is.

“What kind of public sex freak are you?” Kendall tries to play it like a joke but he’s honestly a little concerned. He might have to work with some of these people someday, he doesn’t want to get caught and known as the weird cross dressing public sex guy.

“The kind that sees you’re getting into this but are getting spooked like a real horse.” Logan’s got a much softer teasing sort of smile now and Kendall is amazed at how he can just flip the switch between dirty talking sex machine to nice guy next door so easily. Actors, pft. “Chill out, I’m not just going to fuck you in public, unless that’s your thing, no judgment here.” Logan pats his thigh on top of the basketball shorts this time. “Look, you’re hot, despite wearing bright pink, and I’ve got a boner- do me a solid and I can set you up with whoever you want to teach you how to ride. May that be in the sexy way or the legit horse way. I know people,” He says bluntly and shrugs like offering sexual services is totally the same as horse riding lessons.

“Fine,” Kendall relents, relaxing a bit and watching Logan’s face light up. “What do I have to do?” And the dirty sex eyes fall right back into place with the dark grin.

“Just lift yourself up and down,” He slouches his hips under Kendall and the hand rummaging under the skirt bumps at Kendall’s balls, making Kendall huff out a breath and pull at Logan’s shoulders. “Mmm, yup, that’s good too. Not too much noise though, can’t be louder than the music. Ready?” Kendall nods, closing his eyes and tries not to think too much about how under all the opaque layers Logan’s got his dick out and he’s jacking himself. He rises up a little and sinks back down, trying not to go too far and sit on Logan’s lap, but Logan pulls at him and Kendall drops unceremoniously. The back of Logan’s knuckles drag on Kendall’s still contained and rapidly growing interested dick. Kendall rises back up quickly and tries again to not sit all the way down, but gets pulled again, resulting in the same teasing slide of knuckles. He tries valiantly one more time to see if this weird instinct Logan’s got will stop, but the same thing happens.

“Would you stop doing that?” Kendall grits out so he won’t make any other noise and he hits Logan’s shoulder with one hand.

“Can’t, you gotta do it right, ‘til you do I gotta fix you,” is Logan’s quick response.

“No one can see if I’m sitting down or not,” Kendall can’t keep the whine out of his voice and he opens his eyes to glare at Logan, only he gets caught by surprise. He figured Logan would be back to looking over Kendall’s shoulder at whatever Demi and Selena were up to, but no. The dark eyes are trained on _his_ face, Kendall’s stupid bushy eyebrowed face, looking up at him from where Logan has slouched and his mouth is hanging open just a little again like when he was watching the girls on the coffee table. In the whole however long he’s known Logan, he’s already pinned the mouth thing as an unconscious tell of when he’s turned on so he’s confused as to why he’s on the receiving end of it. “Dude, what?” Kendall feels self conscious and doesn’t move still.

“Nothin’,” Logan’s slow teasing smile spreads across his face again. “You know you don’t have to make faces if you don’t want to? You’re pretty much facing the corner, no one will see.”

“Right. I mean- I was just making them in case someone saw,” Kendall covers for himself and makes a mental note to pay attention to his face-making more.

“Uh-huh,” Logan seems to know it’s a lie but he lets it go with a little buck of his hips. “’F you want you could just roll your hips, y’know? Switch it up, rest your leg muscles,” The suggestions comes with the casual shrug of one shoulder that makes Kendall realize how sweaty his palms are getting on Logan’s shoulders. He makes the pretense of smoothing the wrinkles he’s gripped into the fabric but he’s really trying to wipe the clamminess away before readjusting his hands to the base of Logan’s neck. Kendall feels kind of silly but he rolls his hips once and immediately regrets it. It grinds him down right onto Logan, who grabs Kendall’s thigh as soon as Kendall comes in contact with his dick. “Hnnn, fuck,” Logan says and bites his bottom lip, eyes squeezing shut for a moment. He gains his composure back and looks up at Kendall again with a smirk. “You’re a natural, keep that up and we’ll be done here in no time.”

“Sorry, I can go back to the other one,” Kendall says and follows it quickly with the up and down, stupidly forgetting that his silky basket ball short covered bulge is pressed pretty firmly to the underside of Logan’s dick and it drags up it then back down against it. The hand on the outside of Kendall’s dress grabs a fistful of his hair and he’s yanked down to crush his mouth onto Logan’s. His teeth can feel the vibration when Logan lets out a hum of a moan through their pressed lips. Here’s the thing, though, Kendall is an avid fan of kissing and when it’s done poorly like this smushing of lips he’s simply not satisfied. This kind of thinking is what prompts his hands to slide up to cup Logan’s jaw while he licks at the seam of his lips and they part easily. They lick into each others mouths in turns and the hand that’s got quite a grip on Kendall’s hair relaxes and drops back down to its place at his hip, pulling Kendall closer.

“God, you, can I-“ Logan pants out when they break for air and Kendall’s chest is heaving and he’s cursing fucking stupid grapefruits and princess dresses.

“Yes, whatever,” He answers but he doesn’t quite know what he’s saying yes to until his basketball shorts are being yanked down in the front and a nimble hand is stroking him out. After so much brushing contact the direct touch feels like the most amazing thing ever, making him shudder. Logan lines them up and bucks up again making Kendall clutch at his neck for a second time.

“Get your hand under here,” Logan gives the almost order while mouthing along Kendall’s jaw but Kendall decides Logan should know he’s not the dumb kid he thinks, so instead of obeying Kendall begins to rock his hips forward and back, sliding their cocks alongside each other and Logan’s hidden hand tries to wrap around both of them as best it can. “Don’t stop,” he says with a little nip at Kendall’s bottom lip before he dives them back into kissing.

Kendall doesn’t stop, he keeps right on rocking and Logan keeps jerking them and they cover up their noises by letting them out in each others mouths until they tip over the edge, one after the other. Their faces are pressed into the others neck and when their panting subsides Logan cleverly uses an errant Halloween napkin to clean them up. He tosses the napkin behind the couch and taps at Kendall’s hip until he gets the hint to roll off and they’re back to a more sprawled version of when Logan first sat down.

“So,” Logan starts and Kendall waits for something cliche to come out of his mouth. “About those riding lessons,” he grins and Kendall thinks it’s cute that he remembered his offer.

“You teach ‘em yourself?” he asks with his own hopefully sexy eyebrow wiggle and Logan licks his lips so he thinks it may have worked.

“Sure do, plenty of other things I could teach you too, no charge,” Logan is so fucking confident that Kendall is going to snatch up his offer right then that Kendall wants to set himself apart, so he restrains himself. Two can play this game.

“How nice,” Kendall gives a plain pleasant smile back before he’s grabbing his wig and snapping his guitar case shut. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go,” he says looking back over his shoulder at Logan’s confused expression.

“But- we- I,” Logan is obviously flustered and Kendall takes pride that he seems to be the first to leave him in such a state since Logan doesn’t understand what’s happening.

“See you at Selena’s Christmas slash New Year’s party,” Kendall tosses back as he starts to walk away. He steals one more glance back and Logan has a smirk on his face, shaking his head in disbelief that he’d been played. Kendall laughs to himself as he searches out Kevin—this had been the best bet he’d ever lost.


End file.
